Boom! Jonathan bounced to the debate podium and took the microphone away from the standing cradle and holding it as a disc jockey, he told the audience that PDP is a women-friendly party that’d field and appoint more women as never – surpassing patronage from other parties.
Boom! Jonathan bounced to the debate podium and took the microphone away from the standing cradle and holding it as a disc jockey, he told the audience that PDP is a women-friendly party that’d field and appoint more women as never – surpassing patronage from other parties.
President Jonathans’ wife was seen nodding her head in a renewed approval in support of what her man had just said. The audience at the debate venue were amazingly sceptical to the open hypocrisy of our president so they wonder if Jonathan has gone to take a course on ‘political spinning’ from erstwhile British Prime Minister Tony Blair. Blair leadership was regarded very high on spinning as per how they sexed up reports and dossiers tailoring them as in good faith while they were loosely porous and utter lies – but nonetheless they attacked Iraq as the highpoint.
A former USA diplomat present at the debate who had been studying Nigerian politics dare stood up and told Jonathan point-blank that his thesis about PDP women friendliness is hype. He took a special exception to the recently concluded PDP presidential primary where the lone woman contender Mrs Jubril scored just one vote for herself. In the aftermath of outvoting her by Machiavellian designs and rigging expertise, Nigerian women have learnt their lessons that PDP has ‘no vacancy’ for them and in effect, women have started leaving PDP en masse pitching their tents with other political parties. Even before PDP presidential selection charade, a forwarding-thinking woman as Dora Akunyili has decamped to alternative party. She was not deceived by the sweet but empty campaigns of Patience Goodluck soldiering for more women in politics. Underrate any woman or women in the collective at your own peril!
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President Jonathan has had bellyful of churning Buhari successes so he’s set to mud him up terribly. In fact PDP sees Buhari in the fashion of a political aficionado. To them, he has done everything right that PDP has done wrong since 1999. He chose a like-minded very popular, pro-masses, ant-Establishment and equally incorruptible man as his 2i/c. He has female Stella Lebi as a spokesperson even as the male one Yinka is a Media personality – unlike the guttersnipe of a spokesman who drove onetime Foreign Affairs minister away from her work. Plus, Buhari mixes and mingles with progressives as the SNG and co. groups. Buhari has become the darling of Nigerians and further internationalists who think that he is more embraced both by lower people and straight upper class clique.
Miffed by Buharis' tall order of achievements for so short a time, Jonathan pumped up his bile attacking Buhari as a religious fanatic who’s only romancing Bakare to strengthen up his ‘rotten’ religious deviancy. Just then, would-be president Ribadu opened his eyes in wider amazement as if agreeing alongside Jonathan that Buhari is an unrepentant religious bogey man fanatic. Buhari was unperturbed by such definition of him but his vice Bakare was seriously embarrassed in utmost on how dirty politics could be for a starter. For once he thought if it weren’t better he return to pastoring. But however, he steeled up his mind and concluded he has seen it all in life and he’d be a rock in politics as he was a pastor. Although Jonathan had much to say, his time was up so he hurried away from the podium. But that was after he had wowed the debate audience that he’d concentrate on building more railway to upping train transport because tyres from heavy-duty vehicles are responsible for spoiling our roads.
Good evening ladies and gentlemen! Said Buhari with no false modesty attached to it. I must begin by saying that our president has buccaneered our statecraft into injury time that Nigeria needs a rescue team and by special grace of ‘God’ Tunde Bakare and I have come to give and nurture Nigeria with a new lifeline. Be rest assured my fellow countrymen and women, boys and girls! He intoned with cautious but positive optimism. As a man of few words and plenty actions, Buhari took Jonathan on by saying that everything about his regime is faked and corrupted out of awing proportion. He opened up confessing reading Sahara Reporters.com daily as do many politicians but none would actually accept they do; until they fall into trouble and need bailout that’s when they confess ever knowing SR as matter of fact. He boasted that his spokeswoman Stella Lebi signs all her blog off on Sahara Reporters with her real name while accusing Jonathan spokesman and his other co-persons as using dodgy pseudo to remain clandestine. He urged them to come clean on this and more - because, leadership is about putting your names and hands where Nigerians can see if they’re clean.
Buhari took a bitter swipe at the corrupt spending spree of Jonathan’s regime acknowledging that a responsible government should be as Spartan as old Greece humankind. This regime has chosen the same road as the Sodomites countrymen of old in spending our lean thrift on baseless and unseeable spirit projects he opine: punching the innocent air as if it were its fault; thereby exposing his thin hands unlike the bulky ones of IBB and OBJ. Not that Buhari is starving to death that is his nature. Just as he wanted to expatiate that he’s as sure as egg is egg to make it to Aso Rock and expose and punish corrupt ‘politically exposed persons’ with heavy hand, the debate moderator motioned him on that his time was up. Thank you all he said. So he left the podium graciously for Ribadu to debate on.
Ribadu enters the podium with somewhat shaky naivety not that Ribadu lacks lustre or not cut out to be a great leader. He is rock solid, incorruptible, and somehow trustworthy to his level best and a tested public server. His mourning per se arises from the ungovernable passion of Bola Tinubu to undermine him as presidential candidate; double-dealing away their party prospect for his private cravings same way OBJ’s self-aggrandisement has bedevilled PDP till this day.
That aside, Ribadu started with usual police catchphrase “who no dey no dey and when jungle mature everybody go answer iem papa name.” Meaning that he’s happy making it as presidential hopeful: a touchstone achievement to start with. PDP must be sacked this April he thundered into the microphone. You could already feel the avalanche of energy inside this young man. No wonder some people are capitalising on a more youthful candidate. But what good is a young candidate who’s corrupt from pillar to post, ceiling to floor? The debate audience were unanimous that it’s better to have an old incorruptible hand than a youthful crook as president. Most officeholders doing corruption in Nigeria are younger generation as Demiji Bankole and Jonathan Goodluck. Ribadu almost cursed Buhari for spoiling the union between his party and that of CPC but he contained himself knowing that by and by after the election he’d be working with Buhari to resuscitate Nigeria from PDP ruin. Just as Ribadu was bubbling hot to hit Jonathan and PDP harder, the debate moderator reminded him that his time was up.
Thank you all for coming, said the moderator with correct appreciation. The next debate would be a storm of activities he enthused conclusively.
Sunday Njokede writes from The European Union
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